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Rules of the Road according to Aunt Clara

by Aunt Clara –

Aunt Clara has been driving for more years than she cares to tell. Of course many boys with their fancy cars tried to take Aunt Clara for rides and thought the way to her heart was an automatic transmission and built in heater. Those things were nice and it was on more than one occasion the citizens of Grafton could see Aunt Clara riding in Ernie Shliebs brand new Daimler 15 or with Bob Brusso in his Delage D6 with a 3045 cc engine he was very proud of.

Cars were different back then, with V-8, V-12 and even V-16 engines. Gas was 10 cents a gallon and there was plenty of it so big engines and huge heavy bodies were all the rage. While cars were different, people were the same. There was old Jim Corbett who was always speeding down North Street and racing by Graftonites who were sitting on the Common. Old Jim would swerve around kids and cows nearly clipping one or the other. He was forgiven his driving transgressions when it was finally found out that he always had to reach his destination quickly before he forgot where he was going.

Old Jim’s driving did not really irritate Aunt Clara, as she was quick on her feet and always looked both ways twice before crossing the street. What is bothersome is these drivers who do not know the rules of the road. We are in the 21st century, have access to the “world of wide webs,” so everyone should be familiar with good driving etiquette.

It would behoove all of Grafton to adhere to a few rules that will make driving in town better for everyone. If Aunt Clara is attempting to pull out into traffic do not stop for her if there are no cars behind you. It is quicker if you just drive on by and Aunt Clara will pull out when you pass. Not only do you slow the whole driving process down you also expect Aunt Clara to give you a thank you wave for your kind consideration. Now that is irritating.

Aunt Clara’s eyes are not what they used to be so she may tailgate a little to better see the vehicle in front of her. Do not pull over and wave to Aunt Clara that she can pass you. That seems to be something people are now doing to make themselves seems superior to other drivers. If you do this, Aunt Clara might just pull right up behind you and give you a piece of her mind.

As for turn signals, please familiarize yourselves with Massachusetts general law, chapter 90, section 14b. Do not put your turn signal on a mile before you are going to turn. This makes Aunt Clara very upset. Also, for you middle aged yahoos who love to speed up to the turn, then slam on the brakes and place your blinker on 30 feet before you turn—stop it. You are on notice.

Last, when going through a yellow light make your decision well before you arrive. Do not slow down, think about it and then speed through like a race car driver. Once you have slowed like that Aunt Clara has come to a rolling stop and now she can gets stuck at the red light. We could both whiz through if one of us had any common sense.

Remember this one rule: anyone driving slower than Aunt Clara is a slow-poke and anyone driving faster is a maniac. If everyone does as Aunt Clara does we would have safer roads and a much better driving experience for all.

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